Tuesday, July 31, 2012

The Only War Museum I'm A-War Of (Part 2)

29.07.12 (Duxford, UK) Part 2

Duxford Imperial War Museum is so big that it takes three blog posts to contain it all. So hang around these parts for the next round of pictures from my excursions around Anglia.

Along the airstrip, which as I mentioned in the last post was so freakin' long that it disappears into the vanishing point, we find the usual food fare for a museum: a cafeteria with overpriced ice cream and fish n chips and a themed coffee shop called Wing Co. Joe's, outside of it an advert featuring a dubiously enthusiastic airman enjoying what I can only imagine is his last cup of Joe before he's shipped out to the Pacific Theatre. While we avoid the food and drink, we do manage to catch a few planes as they're taking off from the runway. After that we head to the American Air Museum, in which about twenty American aircraft from World War II and beyond dangle from the ceiling and are arranged in a complex tangle of overlapping wings.








That dome is the American airplane hangar. Inside, the planes were suspended from the ceiling and arranged in an overlapping style. At the center was a B52D.


The plane from the photo just above.












Check out the Huey!


It sure is...




(Part three to follow)


Monday, July 30, 2012

29.07.12 (Duxford, UK) - The Only War Museum I'm A-War Of - Part 1

29.07.12 (Duxford, UK)

Sunday. I convince Ahron to go to the Duxford War Museum for the day. A fifteen minute coach ride and seventeen pound entry fee (per person) later and we're finally inside. The War Museum is arranged along an airstrip that must string along the Anglian fields for a solid mile. The runway is in operation year round, the site of airshows and celebrations, but today several single-prop pre-war biplanes take off and land with regularity. We enter at one end and walk from one end to the other, looking at the exhibits, hidden away in giant clinically clean hangars. There are several locations that we saw at the museum, and it rained toward the end of our trip, drenching us because we were only wearing tee shirts and shorts. 

Instead of waxing on about our journey, taking almost four hours, I'll just show you the pictures and you can narrate for yourselves. Enjoy!

The Boeing B17 Flying Fortress, or Memphis Belle, in all her glory. This plane is still in operation, though it does not have any scheduled flights today.




In the first hangar were a bunch of planes (unsurprisingly). Here are a few:













(Part two to follow...)


Tuesday, July 24, 2012

The Queest for the Hoolie Graayle (Part 2 of 2)

22.08.12 (Cambridge, UK) - The Queest for the Holie Graal


Passus Quartus


In grete need were we knightes two of sustenaunce, and right ynough hadde we of thisse heet, so seeke we out a place whereto maak repentaunce. 


Vpon the crest of this wid hille went we, and found so gladsom a thing, of mirthe and high solas and litel hevynesse therein, 
an inne for we wary knightes two
to reste oure heeds and walk no mo. 


Herein was duellyng in thisse cotage, pesaunts of the typ italiauns. A poore wenche ther was, and wyth courage for the nones. 


"Greetyngs pesaunt," quod the greet knight Ahron of Histoy, sword shining brite. "Hadde there a graal near anon? Tis the quest of this faire compaignye to find, and soon we fear the sunne wil sette on the day and soone it shal be nygte!"



Quod she, "Nay by me fay! There had been no graayle heere today! But natheless, can thee some ynterest bee in oure fyn meed?"


"Meed a two," quod I. "And for me a bowl of beest fruit, certaygne!" 


She wente to the inne and, shortly, returned she wyth a plate of fruits so swete, of colours blaak and grene, with such delyte was I, I found it difficult for which to mak to speche. 


Sir Ahron of Histoy mad quicklee for to eet, but when he did his face turn'd reed as if he et a leek! 






"By God, namore of this!" Quoth then the knight. "I say for me thys ys of soom grete dysease! Ther ys no wors thyng in thysse loond, taak thisse recced bowl fro me sight, plese!"


"Ha ha!" laughed I. "for cristes passion! Thes olivs had leeft a sharpe impressioun!"


"Laugh ye not! Tis not funie!" quod he. "For certes, these smal round thyngs of the devyl be!"


But certes did I laugh, as did we alle at the inne. Yt was so grande a jape that bifore longe wente they alle toward their touns a tale for to spinne!


[Trans: Passus Quartus


We two knights were in great need of sustenance, and we had had just enough of this heat, so we sought a place where we could make repentance. Upon the crest of this wide hill we went and found a so glad-making a thing, one of mirth and high happiness, and where little seriousness was, an inn for we two weary knights to rest our heads and no longer walk.



Inside the dwelling, in this cottage, were Italian peasants. A poor wench was there, but one with great courage.


"Greetings, pesant," said the great knight Ahron of Histon, sword shining brightly. "Was there a grail here recently? It is the quest of our fair company to find one, and soon we fear the sun will set on the day, and soon it will be night!"



She said, "No, by my faith! There had not been a grail here today! However, do you have any interest in our fine mead?"


"Two meads," I said. "And for me a bow of your best fruit, truly!"



She went to the inn and, shortly thereafter, returned with a plate of sweet fruits, colored black and green, I was delighted, I found it difficult to speak.


Sir Ahron of Histon quickly went to eat, but when he did his face turned red as if he had eaten a leek!


By God, no more of this food!" Said the knight then. "I say these are like a disease for me! There is no worse thing in this land, take this retched bowl from my sight, please!"


"Ha ha! I laughed. "for Christ's passion! These olives had caused quite a problem!"


"Do not laugh! It's not funny!" he said. "Certainly, these small round things are from the devil!"



But truly I did laugh, as did we all at the inn. It was so big a joke that before long all the folk went to their towns, to spin the tale.]






Passus Quintus 


We turne to studye at thisse taverne, by me faithe, and I must telle you, ere that y further in this tale passe, wel oghte a man be advysed by his bokes. And so did we maken mucel of Cato and Nicholson to studie. Thees bokes habeen oure guides on this oure queest, by my sooth. Sir Ahron did espie such grete a passage therein that we knewe wharre we must mayke for to go! Ahron to me rede a tale of so grete a knight, who guarde the graayle and never gone was yt from his hooly syght! It sayde thisse boke where we most journie, that to seeke out the elde kirche moost we!




We knewe nat in whic countree was this elde kirche, ne what directioun we moost ytake, but quickeley we moost ago welaway, biforen the hotte sunne two knightes as wi'inne a oven ybake!


So thenne we wente, two grete knightes we, out into the wylde and goode countree! Came we to a hill set upon a field, a site it seemed that of wounder of a smalle childe! 


Castle Hille ywys yt cleped by alle, I knewe, and as we aproache by foote, so straunge a sudden yrge we feele. That there Ahron and I moost tak up to fyhte, so therefore did we do, my sword on hem to strike. And he vpon mine own, up the hille we fyhte, and doon too, and up again alyte! 


And sudenlye, I tripp on a stoon, and there I yfalle riht to the groond! Ythought ywys goon to die, but then sudenlie, as his sword wys about to flye, Sir Ahron of Histon and I yspot the source locacioun of oure aflixioun. Thare wys an familie of some lene bodie, come frome the eeste, no launguage of oures did they yspeke. They sette anon on thisse grete hille, and wit ys like opels they were faste ystille! Comixally, I did ydrop mye sword from my hond. And then they must understaund, oure battaile it seem'd was namore than a showcas for the stryngth of the knights of ours faire lond! 


"Pley deed, sir knyght of Chestertone, as though I ye struck. We wille give a them grete storie for to taake hoome, by cristes luck!"


[Trans: Passus Quintus



We turned to our literature at the tavern, by my faith, and I must tell you, before this tale passes any more, a man ought to be advised by his books. And so we did make much use of Cato and Nicholson by means of study. These books have been our guides on this quest, truthfully. Sir Ahron did spy a great passage in one of them that we knew where we must go! Ahron read to me a tale of a great knight who guards the grail and has never let it out of his sight! This book said where we should journey, that we should seek out the old church!


We didn't know in what country lay the church, nor what direction we must take, but quickly we needed to go somewhere, before the hot sun baked the two knights as in an oven.


So then we went, we to great knights, out into the wild and good country! We came to a hill upon a field, a wondrous site, it seemed, like that belonging to a small child.


It was called Castle Hill by everyone, I knew, and as we approached it by foot, we felt a strange sudden urge. Sir Ahron and I felt that we needed to suddenly fight, so we did, my sword was set on to strike him. And his was set on mine, we fought up the hill and down it, too, and up again lightly!


And suddenly, I tripped on a stone, and I fell there right to the ground! I thought I was going to die, but then suddenly, as his sword was about to fly at me, Sir Ahron of Histon and I spotted the source of our affliction. There was lean family, that had come from the East, they didn't speak our language. They were sitting there on the great hill, and their eyes were like opals and fast still. Comically, I did drop my sword from my hand. And then the must understand, our battle it seemed was no more than a showcase for the strength of the knights of our fair land!]


Passus Sextus


We wende then unto a smal kirche, that wys jyst acrs the rode from the hill, of coars!


There into we woulde have ago, but the dore was lock'ed what shoulde we do?


Thy wit ys overcom by oure harde werke whan we get the smal kee from a clerk.


"We ar oon a grete queest," quod Sir Ahron, his bukeler heeld abrest. "Has ye seen the grayile, tell us you meest!"






 "Nay and welaway!" quod the clerk, like a dronke millere. "Not todayee. But inside the chirche you can looke if ye may."


I am so hapie that we can finaley go inne, but there is redtap to do: she makes Sir Ahron to given a proof of his kin.

What sholde I moore seyn? We most the grayle fynde!


I tyrn the kee and the door opyen wyde!

But a graal we do not fynd insyde...

"Nothin is heer, good sir knight! What shal we do hence, thys be shyte!"



We aske for cristes dignitee, "Plese," we preye. "We've ben onne queest all frekyn daye!"






[Trans: Passus Sextus


We went into a small church that was just across the road from the hill, of course!'


We would have gone right into it, but the the door was locked. What should we do?



Your wit is overcome by your hard work, that is until we get the small key from a clerk.


"We are on a great quest," said Sir Ahron, his buckler held to his breast. "Have you seen the grail, tell us you must!"


"No, verily!" said the clerk, like a drunk miller. "Not today. but you can look inside the church if you want."


I am so happy that we can finally go in, but there is red-tape to deal with: she makes Sir Ahron give her some ID. 


What more should I say? We must find the grail!


I turn the key and the door opens wide!


But a grail we do not find inside...


We ask for Christ's dignity, "Please," we pray. "We have been on this quest all freaking day."]


Passus Septimus


We seeke so grete a thyng, but eek our werk, verily, ys worthe not a bene! Acros the toun go we, but where to loke, we do nat knowe.



There ys a path we fynd on a olde parchmynt, a mape of alle the graal sites in toun!




With thys parchment, are corage is yforged newe, we tak a passe, oure direxioon straat and trewe. 




We maak oure wey to a taverne newe, therein we finde a lady who might of the graal knoe. 


"Good Lady," quod I, "We seek the graal, is thyre oon ye might poynt us to?"


"Good sir knights! Grab ye a pynt," quod she. "Thyre be onely on grayel I've ever knoon to be ryht!"


"Ah, ye, verily," quod Sir Ahron of Histoy. "Ey nede a pynt of cydere, alas! Too muche meed gyves to me grete gaas!" 


And so dranke we, with good compaignye, and spook of all the sightes we did a seye.



"Milady, we shal ye protect. Stray not from our sight thisse daye, ye caravaiyn de ne departe for a half-hour or tweye."
And afte we did escort the gode ladie through the daungers of the citee. And tha be alle to be ysed, God saav this grete compaignye!


[Trans: Passus Septimus


We seek to great a thing, but also our work, truly, is not worth a bean! Across the town we go, but where to look--we do not know.


There is a path we find on an old parchment, a map of all the grail sites in town! (lucky us, huh?)


With this parchment, our courage is forged newly, we head for a pass, our direction straight and true. 


We make our way to a tavern new, therein we find a lady who might of the grail know. 



"Good Lady," I said, "We seek the grail, is there one you might point us to?"


"Good sir knights! Grab you a pint," she said. "There be only one grail I've ever known to be right!"


"Ah, yes, truly," said Sir Ahron of Histon. "I need a pint of cider, unfortunately! Too much mead gives me great gas!" 


And so we drank, with good company, and spoke of all the sights we did see.




And after we escorted the good lady through the dangers of the city. And that is all there is to be said, God save this great company!]




 Explicit Queste for the hoolie graaaaaal



Monday, July 23, 2012

The Quest for the Holy Grail - Part One

22.8.12 (Cambridge, UK) - The Queest for the Hooly Graal (1 of 2)


Passus Primus


Greet was my queste, and sharpe warre my wits, whan fro the holie graal I sette. The shoures of July had softe mad the grounde. Yet the clouds hadde gonne offe to reste. But soon did I sette down next to a tree, and my eyes goon harde to see. I slept in a sweven so deep so marvelos that I coulde not believe. And there I saw such a strange land, with strange folk dressed in forign habits that were not the werk of hermits. And  it is of this lond and this folk that I will to you telle. 


Onn the road I se another knight, readie for quest as greet as mine. Sir Ahron of Histoy greet in mighte and stroong in wille, stands oon the corner of the strete istille. 


"Greet sir," quothe I, "Tell me, by Godes love, you are Sirrah Ahron of Histoy, are you not?"


"Tis true," quoth he, "by my faythe, I am. You know who I am but who are you?"


"I am called Sir Christopher of Chesterton," quote I, "a knight of the Ordere Templars. I am on a queest ful good! For it is the hoolie graal I seeke. That greet and noble instrument of oure Loord. Wil you join in this queest?"


"By Goddes dignitee!" quoth he. "I shal thee on this queeste accompanie!"


"Than you shall!" quot I. "Now we wil not be one knight of the Templars, but two."


We knights Templar two set out doon the rode, our swords tuck'ed into oure beelts, our armour ful sturdie, our boots ful redie for to walk. Al be it told in due time that we were to see such sundry folk, as I shall you devyse.


---


[Trans: The Quest for the Holy Grail


Passus Primus


Great was my quest and sharp, my wits, when I set off for the Holy Grail. The showers of July had made the ground soft. Still the clouds had gone off to rest. But soon I sat down next to a tree and fell asleep. I slept in a dream so deep and marvelous that I could not believe it. And there I saw such a strange land and such strange people dressed in strange clothes that were not hermits' habits. And it is of this land and these people that I will tell you of.


On the road I see another knight, ready for a great quest such as mine. Sir Ahron of Histon, great in might and strong in will, stands on the corner of the street very still.


"Great Sir," I said, "Tell me, by God's love, you are Sir Ahron of Histon, are you not?"


"This is true," he said, "By my faith, I am. You know who I am but who are you?"


"I am called Sir Christopher of Chesterton," I said. "A knight of the Templar Order. I am on a very good quest! For it is the Holy Grail I seek. That great and noble instrument of our Lord. Will you join in this quest?"


"By God's dignity," he said. "I shall accompany you on this quest!"


"Then you will!" I say. "We will now be two Knight's Templar!"


We two knights Templar set down the road, our swords tucked into our belts, our armor completely sturdy, our boots completely ready for walking. It will all be told in due time, that we met such lowly folk, as I shall tell you.] 


Passus Secundus


Ye Olde Springe was not for us, so we wende to Les Armes du Portland, a pub similar to one we remember in Normandie. We go a greet distaunce, oore boots digge deepe ond true. A havyn at laste we sye, and ynsyde we fynde oure brewe.


"Milord, I can rede the word 'pub' ond 'greene' but natheless the oder oons are beyond me comprehnsin. We moost continuu on."




We quench'd oure thurst and took in the sunne. We got out of there, methinks, at quartre to wonne. Our queest was not yet finished, our jurnie not yet doon. We walk aloong the road, which wente far as the ey could see. This Passus be ful donne, go on to Passus thre.


[Trans: Passus Secundus


Ye Old Spring was not for us, so we went to the Portland Arms, a place we knew from back in Normandy. We go a great distance, our boots dig deep and true. A haven we see at last, and inside we find our brew (beer). 


We quenched our thirst and took in the sun. we got out of there, I reckon, at quarter to one. Our quest was not yet finished, our journey not yet done. We walk along the road which went far as the eye could see. This passus (chapter) is entirely done, go on to passus three.]




Passus Tertius


The queest is long to make, the daye so long to take. We se a fair field ful of folk, and there we wente, bravelee, into the flok of folk.


Thisse carnival they hadde ymadde was wid and longe. Their tents were al ysette. The folk ful oft et and sette whan the sun was atte his peeke.


 We strod thro, oure breste ablase, oure swords ful redie to bite, but not a onec, sadde to say, didde those folk turn to strike.


Atte the oder ond of the field, we set thro for to passe, and when we strode ful thro, Sir Ahron got ful of gasse.


"I'm brook, and I have to pisse," quoth he, grabbing his codpiece in hond.


"We almost maak to Grafton Castle," quote I. "It wil nat be that long."


We madde for Grafton Castle, as fast as we coold goo, and oon the way found a bank of the Templars. Sir Ahron, ful redeley, strode up to the depositorie to taak oot a few pounds.


"We nede some golde," quoth he, "if we are to maak the roonds."


[Trans: Passus Tertius


The quest is taking a long time, the day is going long, too. We see a fair field full of folk, and there we go, bravely, into the flock of folk.


This carnival they had made was wide and broad. Their tents were all set up. The folk sat and ate when the sun was at his peak.


We strode through, our breasts ablaze, our swords all ready to bite at them, but not once, it's sad to report, did those folk attempt to strike.


We set off to the other end of the field, and when we got through it all, Sir Ahron got gassy.


"I'm broke and I have to piss," he said, grabbing his crotch in hand.


"We're almost to Grafton Castle," I said. "It will not be that long."


We made for Grafton Castle as fast as we could go, and on the way found a bank of the Templars. Sir Ahron went right up to the ATM and took out a few pounds.


"We need some money," he said, "if we are going to make the rounds."]